To Anna

Dear Anna,

I'm writing from Leba,where 2 years ago
we took our only vacation.

I took the train to Stettin,then I hitchhiked and walked
along the tracks.
The rest of the trip was on the old fishing boat.

Just like we did back then.


And now I sit here wondering why I went through all this again.

I was so happy when I back then that I didn't know what to do.
I never thought things wound end this way.
I can't think of anything but you and the dreams that won't fulfilled now,
because I was a stupid idiot.

I know I made the same mistake you made.
Who did what with or without feelings doesn't matter.

I know I hurt you,and that makes me very sad.
You asked me to forgive you,and I said it wasn't so simple.

It is simple,
if I my swallow my dumb,male pride.
I'm doing that now.

As I do it,all the angry is gone.
Instead...

I'm empty and sad.

Anna,I don't know what to do.
I miss you so much.I miss your smile,your skin.
I miss your laugh,
and your swollen eyes when you wake up.
I wanted to have a little Anna with you or maybe five.

I known I was inattentive,not because I didn't love you anymore,
but because I took it for granted that we'd always be together.

Anna,
don't put me out on a sheet of ice.
I want a dignified old age.
I want to feed the ducks with you.

I know that I left,but I really want to come back.
I cannot live without you,Anna.



PS: If you take me back again,
you can let your leg and armpit hair grow as much as you want.
I promise.

Anna,I want to come home again.







哎。。。幼稚老男人的成熟之路


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