You know, sometimes you need more than 20 seconds of insane courage.

I thought if I came out here it would stop.
Back home ,every place reminded me of her. Filippe's on Third Street, Balboa Park, Little Dom's , the coffee shop,that...That's a big one. I mean ,the air,the way ,the way it smelled in May and August, because thouse were the months that her favorite bushes grew flowers all over our neighborhood. They're all triggers ,man.
And it got better for a while. I mean,it ...it did, out here. But the funny thing is that, it just turns out that she's here, too. I mean , I got to Home Depot, I go to the nine-miles-away Target. And seriously ,I'm avoiding half the aisles. Condiments, pastries, forget about it . She loved red kites and blueberry Pop-Tarts. I mean , who doesn't, right?
If only I could talk to her about getting over her. And most of all, it's the kids. They're the biggest triggers of all...
I've figured out is that when you love somebody that much, that hard , that long, you can never get away from them, no matter where you go. And tat only comes ,once in a lifetime. Just can't get a handle on it.
I cannot let go.